Never seen a bat up close like this…
Arghh….
I have been sick for a few weeks… stuffy nose, coughing etc… The last few days the coughing has got worse so I decided to go to the clinic today… I hate the Walk-in clinic here.. the doctors are so rude and the guy I got I really hate cause he prescribes things without explanation…
Anyways… turns out I have bronchitis and my Asthma is getting worse and my old meds just can’t cut it anymore and just weren’t working well when I needed them…. So I got Antibiotics for the infection which I really don’t want to take but everyday my cough is getting worse and all my muscles hurt from coughing… Two new pumps for my asthma and to help clear my lungs from the infection and Cough syrup to help me stop coughing at night (I don’t understand why it needs to have codeine in it though!)… It cost me 210$!!!! I can’t beleive it!! I didn’t even want to go to the clinic but I couldn’t stand the feeling of not being able to breathe right anymore…
Anyways… I also have to go for a chest X-ray on Monday… Arghh….
Same old Gripe….
What do people expect from these babies… I am SO SICK!!! of hearing about babies Crying themselves to sleep… it is SICK!! People seem to have this idea that kids need to learn to self-soothe and that night wakings and having trouble falling asleep by themselves are just bad habits and their kids are just manipulating them… Yeah.. big Manipulation!! They are crying out because they want some warm and tender time and help to fall asleep from the person that they love the most… (I better tell my DH to back off when he cuddles me at night cause that is plain manipulation)
And night wakings… Oh yeah that doctor knows best saying that a 10 month old could not be possibly nursing for any other reason then comfort (and of course needing comfort is wrong and a bad habit… we all want to be alone and uncomforted for the rest of our lives right?) What about hunger? what about thirst? What the Heck does a doctor know about a babies needs, and why the heck is comfort such an awful thing to want…
It really makes me sick to know that parents out there care for their kids yet beleive that they are manipulative little creatures that need to be trained like dogs and need to be taught at as soon as possible that the world is a cold and lonely place and that some needs are just not good enough to be met (emotional being the biggest)… Why do people think that so many adults repress their feelings, are stressed and have emotional needs that have never been met by the people that they loved the most and trusted the most as young children… Why is it that people have so many trust issues?
Well… this will be continued soon because at the moment I am being called to nurse my two beautiful boys to sleep…
My birthday and a night out and the rest of the week…
My Birthday ended up being an OK day… Simon let me sleep in which was nice and then I got a nice breakfast that was prepared by him and Xavier. In the early afternoon I went out for a Chai Latte by myself with the Half blood prince but could really stay there long… I missed the kids and it just didn’t feel right sitting there by myself… Dh in the meantime baked me a cake… When I got back home I asked my neighbor for restaurant suggestions and talked with her for a bit about Sushi and got a craving so I decided to go to a buffet that serves Sushi about 45 min away… When we got there we found out that they only serve Sushi on weekends….
We got back home tired and didn’t end up doing much… It was raining and just too awful to have the fire outside… So we didn’t do much and then headed of for bed… (I didn’t even get to blow out my candles on my cake)
My mother called to wish me happy birthday and so did a good friend of mine Isabelle but no one else… I am a bit disappointed but I guess that’s life…
Wednesday evening however was great… I met my friend Isablle at 5pm and we went to look for a restaurant… It was our first time being together and talking without kids around… It was great.. We were finally able to have a conversation without interruptions!! Anyways… The restaurant was great, the food was great and the conversation was great.. Then we went and got a Chai together and just talked until it was almost 10pm… Then we both had to get back to the kids…
When I got home Colin was sleeping and Xavier was still wide awake… It didn’t take long however for him to fall asleep and then Colin woke up soon after and after nursing a few minutes he was also good for the night…
Thursday night I finally got to make a fire outside and roast marshmallows in my own yard…
Today is Saturday… DH and Xavier have gone to the library by bike and I am at home writing this… We should have a friend coming over later today and usually that means that the guys will have a few beers, we will eat well and we will have a fire tonight and have a great conversation around it…
Tommorow’s my Birthday….
I’ll be 28 tommorow and I am not sure how the day is going to go… I just wish for once that I didn’t have to plan my birthday out and that I could get a great day witout being the lead… I am tired of having to lead, I am tired of sitting on the couch and giving suggestions and having questions as answers asking if that is relly what I want to do…. This year when asked what I wanted to do for my birthday I responded that I didn’t want to make plans and that I wanted things to be planned out for me… we have no plans for tommorow… though I will make marshmallows on the new fireplace rain or shine..