Xavier’s just too weird sometimes….

Xavier is my first born and my little “weirdo”… He is just not like other kids…
As a newborn he was quiet, almost never crying, he was an angel until he was about 18 months old.. I could bring him anywhere and I did bring him everywhere without a peep… The only thing though was that he never fit into groups that I brought him to… he would nurse when he needed to but wasn’t a big comfort nurser, he would eat and would use a spoon or fork almost immediately and he wouldn’t get dirty… (I remember him just before he turned two and he was eating a piece of watermelon and would wipe himself after each bite)
At about 7-8 months old we joined a Mother Goose program… He hated it, he hated when people sang and he hated doing things with the others… We also where in Mom-tot groups that brought the same results… He was and still is a “loner”… It is OK, and I understand that that is who he is but I find it sad that he never wants to play with others and he still doesn’t play well with others especially if he is put in a situation that he needs to do so (like at daycare)…
Xavier also matured very early, he understands things so well but didn’t talk until quite later on…. He loves to play alone, doesn’t like playing games, will pretend but rarely does so if he thinks you are watching…
Toys like the tupperware ball, Stacking rings, stacking cups and all of those really never interested him until he was fully aware that he could do them… He doesn’t like trying new things unless he knows that he has the capacity to accomplish it…
For his first full three years he refused to look at a book with us, now however he is catching up and reads with us everyday… He still hates when we sing though… NO ONE is allowed to sing to him, though I can get around it by saying that I am singing to Colin now….
It’s true though that he also stopped growling at the TV whenever there was a song (or just shutting the TV off) and now actually listens but only if we don’t let him know that we know that he is watching it… Though at the moment the kids are in the bath and Simon put the Lollipop song on and is making them laugh…
He also never really danced until recently and even then he will only do so by Turning around once or twice and then growl and go hide….
Xavier also has the best memory I can imagine… He knows characters be their names (star wars toys etc), he knows songs and what shows they come from, he can often recognize words (yet doesn’t know his letters)
So why do I think he is weird today…
I went on a nature walk with the boys… Xavier doesn’t leave the path at all and won’t walk ahead or behind me.. He holds a walking stick but won’t touch anything also cause he doesn’t want to get dirty… Along the path I decided to try to sing a song…
Here’s the conversation…
Me: Xavier repeat after me OK… (he know what repeat is)
Xavier: OK Mama
Me: We’re going on a bear hunt
Xavier: We’re going… Where’s the bear?
Me: It’s a song that talks about a bear… so repeat after me… We’re going on a bear hunt..
Xavier… Where’s the bear?
Me: (continuing the song) we got the tall grass… do we go around it? No…
Xavier: No…
Me: Do we go over it?… No…
Xavier No…
Me: Do we go through it?
Xavier: Mama?
Me: Yes Xavier?
Xavier: Where’s the Bear?

Thanks Sara for opening my eyes a bit wider….

I was just reading something that a fellow blogger (Sara) wrote that just makes me want rant! In agreement with her of course!

I feel physically sick when I see how the maintsream is raising their babies and then I just want to scream when things go wrong later on… These new generations have explanitions for everything and believe that they are invisible yet take responsability for nothing. The make their kids grow up too fast, force them “self-soothe” , make them supress their feelings, overschedule, over push, over medicate, nutritionally deprive them (through formula, processed foods, lack of vegetables etc) , give them everything material but not emotional, and make them have priorities that are not appropriate for their age and then wonder why they have emotional problems later on it life.

I am made to feel like a freak because I do thing that are not seen as ‘normal’ I breastfeed, co-sleep, wear my baby because I love to do it, I use cloth diapers and practice Elimination Communication, I don’t vaccinate and I won’t be sending my kids to school.. I get comments that imply that I am hurting my kids, I get comments that imply that I have no problems with my kids, I have comments that imply that I love being every second with my kids and imply that I am just lucky… I work so hard to be such a parent in the society that I live and I feel that I am not allowed to complain without being told to take the “easy” way out… and because I don’t complain because I don’t want to rejustify everything over and over again.
I am set apart from other moms because they always feel the need to justify why they chose to do something when they are with me.
I can’t talk about the joys of breastfeeding because they will feel guilty and then expain why they couldn’t for the 100th time even if their reason is crap and they know it, and if I complain about the times that I feel touched out their only solution is to wean and then get into a whole talk about how formula isn’t that bad and they survived and their kids survived… I can’t talk about Xavier’s nursing habits without being told that he is way too old to nurse…
I can’t talk about how Xavier crowds the bed some nights and my back hurts because I will just get the speech about it being important for him to be in his own bed… I can’t talk about Colin nursing at night without someone telling me to just let him CIO and that it is the best solution and it just needs to be done…

I want to leave this city, I want to go live in a commune or somewhere where I will have a community life. I want to live in the mountains again, I want to get rid of “stuff” and live with the basics, I want to peel potatoes with a friend, and sit down and chat over tea, I want to garden and teach and not always be alone…
I want to live in a world where I can finally be myself without constant justification…

I need 5 people for my class..

Now I need 4! Yahoo!!!
I just got a call from a soon to be new mom asking about prices and I told her about the class that I am going to be giving and she said that it sounds great and that she is going to call to give her name…
I am getting really excited about this… I have only sold one to date but I think that the word will soon get out more and the more people that use them in public the more that people will want one… We don’t have a big town and everyone startes and asks questions about them when we are out so I know that people are interested….

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