Wow…
About 2 weeks ago we went on a nature walk with the boys… (I mentioned it here) When we left Xavier had a mega-tantrum… he didn’t want to come home, he cried the whole way home, made a big scene and when we got home it was even worse… He was just completely out of whack… I sat down to nurse Colin and he got really upset and was trying to pry Colin off the breast and I just lost it and brought him to his room and closed the door… telling him that he couldn’t come out until he was calm…. A lot of things, not only that day had led me up this point… Everyday it was becoming a struggle with him.. I would bring him to the park and I had to drag him home kicking and screaming, I said no, or in a minute, or after and he would demand “NO!! NOW!!!! WHAAAAA!!!…. this had been going on for quite while and we just didn’t know how to deal with it… and That day I just had it…. I couldn’t deal with it anymore…. So I put him in his room, on his bed. He got up, I didn’t say a word and brought him back, he did it again, So did I…. Finally, he stayed on his bed and I went to sit down in the livingroom, and nurse Colin who was also crying because he was tired and hungry and wanted to nurse. I sat down, nursed Colin breathed and about 7-8 minutes later I got up, gave Colin a toy to keep him occupied and went to talk to Xavier… I sat down on the floor face to face with him….I talked to him like he was an adult, I needed to get some things out… I needed to tell him how I felt… It really felt weird talking to Xavier like that…
I told him how I didn’t like how he always demanded things, I told him that I was tired of the tantrums, I told him that I needed him to appreciate the things we give him and the things we do with him and be happy with that… I told him that I loved him and that I loved doing things with him but I couldn’t deal with the whining and the tantrums anymore…. He said Sorry…. I said Sorry…. We hugged each other for a minute and got up to continue with our day…
Since that day, since that conversation I have a little boy that is a pleasure to be with… there is no longer a fight to sit at the dinner table (we don’t care if he eats or not but we want him to sit with us) However, not only is there no longer a fight, he actually eats more. When we go somewhere like the park or a walk there are no more fights when it is time to come home, when we go anywhere (swimming, shopping etc) he listens to us and it has been a pleasure going with him because of it… He actually Thanks me now for bringing him somewhere and seems to appreciate it now… and it makes me want to bring him everywhere now!
The remarkable thing though is that his vocabulary has evolved in the last few weeks… he has never been a big talker, he did talk but not really complete sentences… it was different… Now he talks in ways that I just couldn’t imagine…
Since that day we both have had a major turn around…. I am doing more and more things with the kids because it is no longer a struggle and all of us are having much more fun…..

Xavier is my first born and my little “weirdo”… He is just not like other kids…
As a newborn he was quiet, almost never crying, he was an angel until he was about 18 months old.. I could bring him anywhere and I did bring him everywhere without a peep… The only thing though was that he never fit into groups that I brought him to… he would nurse when he needed to but wasn’t a big comfort nurser, he would eat and would use a spoon or fork almost immediately and he wouldn’t get dirty… (I remember him just before he turned two and he was eating a piece of watermelon and would wipe himself after each bite)
At about 7-8 months old we joined a Mother Goose program… He hated it, he hated when people sang and he hated doing things with the others… We also where in Mom-tot groups that brought the same results… He was and still is a “loner”… It is OK, and I understand that that is who he is but I find it sad that he never wants to play with others and he still doesn’t play well with others especially if he is put in a situation that he needs to do so (like at daycare)…
Xavier also matured very early, he understands things so well but didn’t talk until quite later on…. He loves to play alone, doesn’t like playing games, will pretend but rarely does so if he thinks you are watching…
Toys like the tupperware ball, Stacking rings, stacking cups and all of those really never interested him until he was fully aware that he could do them… He doesn’t like trying new things unless he knows that he has the capacity to accomplish it…
For his first full three years he refused to look at a book with us, now however he is catching up and reads with us everyday… He still hates when we sing though… NO ONE is allowed to sing to him, though I can get around it by saying that I am singing to Colin now….
It’s true though that he also stopped growling at the TV whenever there was a song (or just shutting the TV off) and now actually listens but only if we don’t let him know that we know that he is watching it… Though at the moment the kids are in the bath and Simon put the Lollipop song on and is making them laugh…
He also never really danced until recently and even then he will only do so by Turning around once or twice and then growl and go hide….
Xavier also has the best memory I can imagine… He knows characters be their names (star wars toys etc), he knows songs and what shows they come from, he can often recognize words (yet doesn’t know his letters)
So why do I think he is weird today…
I went on a nature walk with the boys… Xavier doesn’t leave the path at all and won’t walk ahead or behind me.. He holds a walking stick but won’t touch anything also cause he doesn’t want to get dirty… Along the path I decided to try to sing a song…
Here’s the conversation…
Me: Xavier repeat after me OK… (he know what repeat is)
Xavier: OK Mama
Me: We’re going on a bear hunt
Xavier: We’re going… Where’s the bear?
Me: It’s a song that talks about a bear… so repeat after me… We’re going on a bear hunt..
Xavier… Where’s the bear?
Me: (continuing the song) we got the tall grass… do we go around it? No…
Xavier: No…
Me: Do we go over it?… No…
Xavier No…
Me: Do we go through it?
Xavier: Mama?
Me: Yes Xavier?
Xavier: Where’s the Bear?