The Kids – Page 31 – a hippie with a minivan

Like weeds they are….

I can’t believe how fast the boys are growing… Xavier is now 3.5 and is such a little man.. He was a late talker but is now completely caught up, especially in English..his french is getting better and better everyday but is still not as extensive as his english… but he understands both perfectly…

Today he went to daycare… I wanted to take him out for good before the holidays but each time I ask him he says that he wants to go back… for the first time a few weeks ago he even atarted talking about a friend…. he has always been very independant especially in play and him talking about another child was a big deal…. I really do like this daycare Center though and though I never thought I would have a child in daycare I think it is a good thing for a child like Xavier. This Daycare has a very big family feel… suprising for a center… the youngest kids are 18 months and the oldest are 5. All of the kids know all of the educators even though they have a main educator for each group. Most mornings I bring Xavier into a group that has bigger kids then him and he stay there for about an hour until he goes into his usual group… this morning however, he decided that I wanted to go into the “baby” room… I brought him to the room and he was greeted with a smile and a welcome and there he said bye with a big smile…

Though I do love having him here at home with me, it does feel nice to be at home with Colin alone and Colin also likes being able to play without being bothered by his big brother, and because Xavier enjoys it he will continue for now….

The 3’s are very different then the the 2’s… both are very challenging but in different ways… Before it was about acting out, tantrums, a fair bit of aggression etc… the 3’s have brought on different and equally frustrating challenges…. Also, the “Why?” questions have started and though I don’t mind anwsering there is a limit to my answers… I really don’t know why the an apple is called an apple, I don’t know why playing with toys is fun, I don’t know how to explain why cats have tails…It is great though…. he really starting to look and act like a big kid…. I can see that in a mere 1.5 years he will be a 5 year old…

Xavier also now knows a few letters by name and can recogize all of our names…. he can also count to about 15 in english and at least ten in french…. he is not the kind of kid that learns by sitting down and being taught, he gets uncomfortable and irriated and gets upset if he feels that someone is trying to “teach” him….he is more apt at learning by observation and it confirms for me that unschooling is the best option for our family… (of course I have alway wanted that)

Colin is now 16 months and is no longer a baby at all… he is a little jokester, always trying to make us laugh… he is now at a point that he is really learning all of the “tricks of the Trade” from his older brother… he loves climbing on the table, playing, testing us, going up and down, up and down, up and down, up and down the stairs and i so gos that most of the time we no longer use a baby gate…

He loves playing in the snow, looking at books, dancing, listening to music and all of the other “normal” toddler stuff that Xavier never enjoyed and He is simply a joy to be with…

He is also in a phase that he wants Maju every few minutes and would stay at the breast every second of the day if I allowed him…. I don’t mind nusing him often but I get sensitive especially after ovulation (before AF) and it can get really irritating and sometimes painful… he is also not a quiet nurser and trys to nurse in every position possible…. As for sleep.. he had been fighting bedtime lately… getting to sleep quite late and then the minute we go to bed and the house gets quiet he wakes up to come into our bed and stays for the rest of the night… I am not sure if or how many times he nurses during the night because I sleep though it…. Last night I asked Simon if I will ever have the night to myself again… I love co-sleeping but I miss being able to turn over…

They are growing like weeds… but they are blooming into the most beautiful beings…

I am not a violent person… but…..

Oh my god I wanted to see that woman hurt!!

I have rarely felt this way about anyone but today this woman just made me see red.

We went to see the “pediatrician” today and it was one of the worst experiences of my life… After almost 2 hours of waiting I got in her office and she didn’t have clue of why we were there until I told her that she is the one that called me about the test results… I let her do her shtick as she explained to me that she wanted to have more blood tests taken to see Colin’s Iron storage levels, she examined Colin (who was amazing like always and let her do her thing without a sound) and then started to explain the papers that she was giving me… I asked her if he was anemic 2 weeks ago when he was in the hospital and he wasn’t, it was just on the last test that his levels were going lower, (his white blood cell count i back to normal btw) then I asked if it could be due to the meds that he had taken or the virus and attempted to show her what I had found but she said that she wouldn’t look at it and said that she has never heard of anemia being caused by such circumstances.. I then asked her if the tests could wait a few weeks so that we could see if it goes up naturally but she didn’t agree and said that it had to be done at that moment and then started to fill out the paper to see a dietician also.

While we were talking, Colin was in the pouch and signed Maju, so I just let him drink…

She got UPSET saying that now he couldn’t get the tests done today cause he is supposed to fast for at least 4 hours… I said in a “joking” kind of way that he would then not have the test for a few more months because he drinks often still, and besides from what I have learned there are to contradictions of breastfeeding before a blood test and it is considered a “clear liquid” just like it is considered a clear liquid before surgery…. she disagreed and said that breast milk is just like any other solid and it can’t be taken for 8 hours prior to surgery (this is NOT true) and then said that I should come first thing in the morning because then he would have been the night without eating… So stupidly I told her that he still eats at night so that i not an option either…

This is when the conversation got heated, first she started telling me about how breast milk after a year has no more nutritional value (but just antibodies) , so I laughed and asked her if it just magically changed overnight at their first birthday or what? She then asked if I give extra Iron and Vit D, because there isn’t enough in breast milk, I said no, but I assure that they have enough sun exposure… she then said that there is not enough Iron in breast milk so it is very important to give supplements… I then said something like Isn’t it true though that there is less Iron in breast milk, but it is absorbed at a rate of 50% compared to the 4-10% absorption in Formula and cow milk and therefore there is actually more Iron that is absorbed when breastfed… she then scuffed it off and then preceded to tell me that as a “Pediatrician” she has a few “rules” that she tells parents and (this became the turning point from frustration to Anger)…

1. Babies should never sleep in their parents bed because it is dangerous blah blah blah… and when I told her that I don’t agree she then told me about a baby that does in the moms bed…. we argued a bit on that point and then she went back and said her first point again and then said

2. they have to be sleeping through the night by 2 months old and then told me about CIO… this is when I kind of exploded, I told her that I actually love my kids and wouldn’t let them CIO because I want them to know that I will always be there for them, I asked her about breastfeeding babies and if she has the same “rule” especially since breast milk is digested easily and she said that by 8 weeks old babies no longer need to eat at night and they need to start to learn to be independent, she then told me that she is a doctor not a psychologist and she just says what she believes it to be better medially … I stood up at that point and started to leave…While I started picking up everything and started to head out of the door I asked her if she truly thought that a 2 month old needed to be trained how to be independent, and if it sleeping though the night was truly a medical issue, and I started to go for the paper on her desk, and this is where it really got to me… she didn’t let me pick up my paper on her desk for the blood test and continued in her rant about how dangerous it was to co-sleep and how she is a doctor etc… I told her at that point that she was crazy…(she answered by saying that I shouldn’t call a “pediatrician” crazy)….

I then took the papers from her hand and left….

This is what I was talking about the other day when I said that I can’t understand why people actually listen to idiots like her…

Why the hell did I have that kind of conversation when I was going in to check his blood for Iron? Why do these idiots think that their medical degree gives them the right to give out parenting advice especially to someone that didn’t need it and didn’t ask for it…

I left there feeling like I wanted to hit something, I wanted to hit her, I was shaking, I had tears in my eyes, I was upset and everything that I was in there in the first place was taken out of my head by her ignorance and stupidity, if she doesn’t even know the basics about breastfeeding how can I trust that she knows the basics about other things….

Without thinking, I headed to the blood test room… I asked them if it was OK if he had nursed before and they told me that breast milk is fine before a blood test and won’t change a thing. I asked if it was possible to keep him in the pouch like the last blood test we had taken and she said no and that she had to go in his arm.. I looked at her and asked if she was serious, Looked at Colin, thought it though a minute, and then asked if the paper would still be good in a few weeks and she said yes… I went back to the secretary and asked fer the prescription back…

I then headed across the hall to the archives room and asked to get a copy of Colin’s file. (I will have it at the beginning of next week) and then headed back to the blood test room and asked if I get the test done in a few weeks if I can just get the results myself so that I can bring them to the doctor of my choice and they said that there shouldn’t be a problem.

So….Here is my plan….

I love my family doctor even though he is an hour away and I don’t want to ever see that woman again… so I called my Family doctor when we got home, told him a bit about the situation and asked if it would be ok to just go get a blood test in a few weeks and then go see him with the results of the blood test and his medical file… he said that he would be happy to do that with me and that there is no problem waiting a few weeks (as long as it isn’t a few months) to see if things have improved and that he would be there when I was ready… he did however say that it would be better to make sure that he is eating well and to provide some high iron foods in the meantime to help him get his storage up…

So, though I didn’t want to go see dietitian I just took an appointment anyways.. I think it could be a good opportunity to ask a few questions about diet… best foods for iron, calcium and other vitamins and what food should be taken together etc to best help absorb…. especially because I would like to shift towards a more vegetarian diet and I have an older picky eater …

Here we go again….

Well… the pediatrician called last night to say that the blood test results are back and that I have to go in and see her because he (Colin) is anemic… she even tried to get me to go last night because she is not in today… but I am going to go tomorrow… I am glad because she mentioned the “importance to start Iron supplements” on the phone and I wanted to do a little more research before heading into her office…

I am glad I did…

First… Sure he may have been anemic at the moment of the blood test.. he was just getting over his virus, didn’t have his appetite back yet, was on antibiotics etc… However, he had had 2 blood tests while he was in he hospital and nothing was mentioned.. and I am pretty sure that they would have seen that he was anemic at that time….

Secondly, with the small bit of research, within the first sites I visited, I found this…

“More often, aplastic anemia is caused by a virus infection or exposure to certain toxic chemicals, radiation, or medications, such as antibiotics, antiseizure medications, or cancer medications”. ….. “This is known as an aplastic crisis. Healthy children can also develop a mild anemia for about one month following viral infections.”
http://www.utoronto.ca/kids/Anemia.htm

“Another common cause of mild anemia in children, especially with a normal MCV and no other symptoms, is a recent infection, such as an ear or sinus infection, which can cause decreased production of red blood cells for a short period of time (usually about a month).

If your child doesn’t have any risk factors for having iron deficiency (see below), and has a mild anemia without symptoms and has a normal MCV (normocytic anemia), then his blood counts may just be rechecked in a month or so without beginning empiric treatment with iron, especially if he has had a recent infection.”

http://www.keepkidshealthy.com/welcome/commonproblems/anemia.html

I know that I wouldn’t have went with Iron supplements anyways and would have stayed with a Iron rich Diet instead but even now I think that I am not going to make any changes even if the pediatritian reccomends it tomorrow…

My reasoning for this?

– He is breastfed.

– I think they would have seen if he was anemic during our hospital stay (with the 2 blood tests)

– I think that he wasn’t anemic before and his red blood count is down because of either (or all) of the following factors…the infection, the antibiotics or the antiseizure medicine that they gave in addition to the poor appetite because he was not feeling good…

– He has NO Symptoms

And most importantly

– If we do make a diet change or give supplementation and then go back in a month to check his blood and he is back to normal then they wouldn’t know if it is back to normal because he is just feeling better naturally or because he is truly Iron deficient or something else…

However, I will ask to go back in a month to check his level again to make sure that it does go up naturally…

If I would have went to her office last night I would have not been prepared at all… At least I am now a bit more informed on the whole situation, armed with info from a (medically) respectable source etc….

Maybe my lack of trust in doctors can be a bit of a hassle sometimes but I would rather do my own research and go into an office ready and informed then just assume the doctor is an “all knowing god” because of a doctorate…

I’ll tell you how it goes tomorrow…

A few Ramblings…..

Well… the holidays are officially over for us…

Sob…. Simon went back to work this morning… It felt really good having him here for almost two weeks…

The week before new years was taken to lounge around and be lazy all day for a few days which just made me relax and got a lot of stress out finally… Colin is growing up so fast and changing so much… over the holidays we have seen a remarkable change… he went from baby to toddler completely… We have almost no more need for the gate at the top of the stairs because he goes down them with no problem… Keeping the gate open also makes it great when we both (Simon and I) wan to do things on different floors…. now the kids can just freely go between us which also means that they play more knowing that they can get to us whenever they want to…. It feels now that the gate is shifting from being a safety device to a way to restrict movement which doesn’t feel right…. I just can’t believe that this time has come so fast….

Colin has also been eating everything lately and trying everything!! Recently we found out he LOVES black olives, escargots and Wakame (Seaweed Salad with spicy Chile-Sesame dressing)
Colin can also get on a chair and sit at the table with us which is another big change… hre are some pics of how big he is now…

Eating Wakame (note the green tinged tongue)

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New Years also brought old friends…

New years eve we made the gingerbread house that we had put off for a few weeks… Not that we didn’t have the time to do it but we didn’t take the time to do it… When we did got to it though we had a lot of fun and Xavier showed off his talents… It was great!

We had two friends come over for new years eve… Yan, a good friend of ours and who has taken a kind of “godfather” role for Xavier and Martine, a childhood friend of Simon’s that has become a good friend of mine… Martine has been in Equador for some time now for her thesis and found love there, so she is now just visiting to to turn in her thesis in and see family… She is one of those friends that you can’t not love… she is sweet, fun, honest and you just feel comfortable with her… one of those people that you don’t feel the need to entertain them all of the time… you can just be yourself…. So, it was great when we found out that the stay would be a bit longer then we expected… it will be sad for all of us to see her go tomorrow…

Here are some more pics…

Martine and Colin in the Ellaroo

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And well…. here are some more pics to share…. (I feel I have neglected Xavier in this post 😉 )

Xavier with the Hobberman ball….

And IN the Hobberman ball

and to finish….

a self portrait….

X-mas 2005

Well X-mas has come and gone and it was really not that bad… My mom and Alain arrived at about 6pm, my dad arrived at about 7:30, we all talked, laughed and there was no tension at all.. I think the situation was a bit awkward for Alain when my dad arrived but they hit it off pretty fast and the awkwardness left quickly… Xavier, before going to bed, wanted to leave cookies and milk out like in the Santa Story… so Simon helped him do that… The kids went to bed by about 8:30 and then our super started….
We had an entrée of cheese and freshly baked bread (I made 3 loaves of sourdough) , Lobster and escargots and then fondue with a side of my spinach salad with Maggi dressing (garlic, maggi, oil, vinegar, pepper) bean sprouts and cashews…
By the time that we were done we were too full for dessert… (I had made an Apple Crumble)
My dad went to bed first, then Simon and I, then my mom and Alain. Before going to bed Alain places the half eaten Cookies and empty glass of milk, left out by Xavier next to the tree so that he would see it in the morning.
In the morning, Colin woke first and we stayed in bed until Xavier woke up and came into the room… then we quickly headed out to see the presents under the tree…
One of the presents, the Thomas Train, was set up under the tree by Simon the night before, and that got Xavier’s attention more then the other presents. We all sat down, coffee in hand, to watch them open their presents and Xavier wasn’t even ready to start, happily playing with his Thomas Train. We asked him to look at the presents and to give them to the person to whom they belonged… It was very surprising when he got to a present that had my name on it… examined it a few seconds and then said…
“dats… um…dis is for mi-si-sa (Melissa)” and handed me the present… We all couldn’t believe it… he recognized my name!! He also recognized his name and Colin’s name… and the presents that didn’t have a name he knew were for Simon…
I love the way that my kids open presents… unlike other kids that I know that just rip into them, Xavier takes the time to open each present slowly and gently, plays a bit with the new toy and then goes to the next present. Sometimes, he didn’t even want to go to the next present to busy playing with the ones he opened previously.
The kids got tons of toys from us, clothes from my mom and grandma. Simon got cologne, a 1.2 Kilo container of Cashews, 2 DVD’s (that he bought as a present from me 😉 ), Chocolates, 2 shirts and a sweater. I bought my mom her Pajama (every year we buy each other Pajamas). I got my pajama, chocolates, a “Roll O Puzzle”and a Sony Flash 1GB MP3 player that Simon won at work…
X-mas day was a lazy day, my Dad left first, then my mom and Alain, needing to get ready for their trip to see his family in “Les Iles de la Madelaine”
We ate the leftover fondue from the night before like we do every year… the kids got to have fondue also which was a hit with Xavier for at least 20 minutes…
I made escargots for myself and Colin wanted some and loved them… so he ate at least 4 of them… Simon and Xavier wouldn’t even taste…
By 10pm we were ready to go to bed and decided to tape the 6 feet Under episode…
Well…here are some pics…

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BTW… this is a great article about Santa and how to keep the magic of Santa without Lying… and this is what we have decided to do…
However, as much as we talk about the story of Santa, Xavier is convinced that Santa exists… so I feel good that we are not lying to him and he is the one using his imagination…