what's next?
ok… someone once asked somewhere when saying that I was a weirdo and “bad mom” because of CLW (child led weaning)… “What’s next? “child-led internet surfing” or “child-led menu planning” or “child-led potty-training” “ (btw… she has since somewhat apoligised, but I haven’t forgotten, or really forgiven… she said some other harsh things)
I think I will deal with these one at a time…
child-led internet surfing… I have to admit… I don’t understand that one… Xavier can navigate quite a few pages of the internet though and I let him… he knows how to go back a few pages, he has self-learned the symbols and colours that often mean yes and no, open and close, play, pause etc in a video… it is actually really surprising what he has learned to do by just doing it… though we are often the ones that open the pages for him (i need to work on a favourites page for him), sometimes if we leave a link on the desktop and tell him about it he can double click it and start games etc… he also now has our old computer set up in the playroom that he can play games on anytime he chooses…
child-led menu planning… umm… why wouldn’t you? We are all members of the family and we all need to eat… why shouldn’t kids have a say in the menu planning?
When I am planning meals for the week I always ask the kids what they want and yes we eat those things, along with things that Simon chooses and I choose… what do the kids ask for? Pizza, fries, soup, pasta, fish, broccoli, mac and cheese, Shepard’s pie, sushi (colin), tacos, bagels, eggs, oatmeal, pancakes and the list goes on… what ends up on the list is a mix of what all of us feel like eating… sometimes it is a meal that I like more than the others, sometimes it is a meal that Simon loves, sometimes it is a meal that the kids love… What is important is to get them used to eating in a healthy way and they will make healthy decisions, pizza is most often homemade, homemade tomato and barley soup, oven fries etc… and if it wasn’t for the kids having a say in the meal-planning we wouldn’t being eating Broccoli or rice… foods that I never liked, but because of the kids liking it and asking me to make it for them, have become important staples in our diet…..
child led potty-training…. umm… of course! what is wrong with allowing someone control over their own body, especially when it is something that they are the only ones that CAN have control over it!
First… EC is exactly that… babes at birth know their pottying needs, they communicate that they need to go, parents choose to listen and aid them in going in a potty, bowl, toilet etc… (something that is the norm in other cultures) or they choose to ignore (by choice or by cultural ignorance) and train the baby to use diapers instead, only to need to untrain and re-learn later on.
It is a bit scary that adults think that they have control over the elimination of another human being. I have seen a few examples of how children are “taught” potty-training… it can be really sad…
If a child has been trained to use a diaper, then they should be allowed to untrain and relearn when they are ready… for some, that may be later, for some it will be earlier… but they will do it when they are ready…
a Khéna update…
Khéna is now just under 5 months old… and he is such an amazing little person.
He almost never cries but he has found out that he can scream… he squeals when he is happy, or when he wants something, when he is bored or uncomfortable… he just loves making that high pitch sound…
EC is going very well… and though he often has a wet diaper when we potty him, he almost never poos in his diaper (average of once every 2-3 weeks or so… if that) We are still having a “problem” when we go out for the day though… he refuses to poo anywhere else than at home, so he holds it in all day… the last times though he hasn’t seemed too upset at the end of the day… however, the day after he does potty many more times…
I love EC though, I love the communication part of it, I love the fact that he never goes long in a wet diaper and never has to sit in his stool… I love the fact that we have listened to his cues since birth instead of ignoring him and teaching him to use diapers as a toilet, and then making him relearn later on… EC is so not about potty-training… it is about communication and the embracing the knowledge that babies can and do have knowledge of their bodies and elimination, however, if they are taught to use the diaper as a toilet they will lose touch with that knowledge.
I wish I would have known about it when Xavier was a baby… I am glad that Colin was ECed from about 2 months old, but I am sad that I didn’t persist during his potty strike when he was about 10 months old… but as I often say… when you know better, you do better…
Khéna has now started nursing a bit less in the day but still nurses quite often… However, he sleeps from about 8pm to about 5am, potties, nurses and will sleep for a bit longer… so his frequent nursing in the day is not a problem! He has also started to eye our food…but of course he still has a few months before he starts to eat…
I think he is finally stopping the rapid weight gain and at almost 5 months he is about 26-27 pounds… just about Colin’s weight and just about 10 pounds shy of Xavier’s weight… I can’t hold him for long in my arms at all, my arms and my back can’t take it, so the wrap, MT or Ergo are lifesavers, I don’t know what I would do without them! A friend came over with her 9 month old recently and not only is he way bigger than her in the chubbiness, he is also as long as her!
Though he can sit now, he still can’t roll over… he tries but he can’t get that last swing in to rotate his hips… a real little Buddha Baby!
Here is my amazing “little” baby….
I’m going to be a Soccer Mom!
OMG my baby’s growing up…
Last year he wanted to play Soccer but he was too young (it starts at 5)… this year though he is old enough and really wants to play so I went to register him tonight…
He was SO happy and can’t wait to start and while waiting in line I realized I’m going to be a Soccer Mom!!
Oh and he is going to be a “timbit”… lol
I needed to bring a pic so I took a few… they came out really well…