Oh my god I wanted to see that woman hurt!!
I have rarely felt this way about anyone but today this woman just made me see red.
We went to see the “pediatrician” today and it was one of the worst experiences of my life… After almost 2 hours of waiting I got in her office and she didn’t have clue of why we were there until I told her that she is the one that called me about the test results… I let her do her shtick as she explained to me that she wanted to have more blood tests taken to see Colin’s Iron storage levels, she examined Colin (who was amazing like always and let her do her thing without a sound) and then started to explain the papers that she was giving me… I asked her if he was anemic 2 weeks ago when he was in the hospital and he wasn’t, it was just on the last test that his levels were going lower, (his white blood cell count i back to normal btw) then I asked if it could be due to the meds that he had taken or the virus and attempted to show her what I had found but she said that she wouldn’t look at it and said that she has never heard of anemia being caused by such circumstances.. I then asked her if the tests could wait a few weeks so that we could see if it goes up naturally but she didn’t agree and said that it had to be done at that moment and then started to fill out the paper to see a dietician also.
While we were talking, Colin was in the pouch and signed Maju, so I just let him drink…
She got UPSET saying that now he couldn’t get the tests done today cause he is supposed to fast for at least 4 hours… I said in a “joking” kind of way that he would then not have the test for a few more months because he drinks often still, and besides from what I have learned there are to contradictions of breastfeeding before a blood test and it is considered a “clear liquid” just like it is considered a clear liquid before surgery…. she disagreed and said that breast milk is just like any other solid and it can’t be taken for 8 hours prior to surgery (this is NOT true) and then said that I should come first thing in the morning because then he would have been the night without eating… So stupidly I told her that he still eats at night so that i not an option either…
This is when the conversation got heated, first she started telling me about how breast milk after a year has no more nutritional value (but just antibodies) , so I laughed and asked her if it just magically changed overnight at their first birthday or what? She then asked if I give extra Iron and Vit D, because there isn’t enough in breast milk, I said no, but I assure that they have enough sun exposure… she then said that there is not enough Iron in breast milk so it is very important to give supplements… I then said something like Isn’t it true though that there is less Iron in breast milk, but it is absorbed at a rate of 50% compared to the 4-10% absorption in Formula and cow milk and therefore there is actually more Iron that is absorbed when breastfed… she then scuffed it off and then preceded to tell me that as a “Pediatrician” she has a few “rules” that she tells parents and (this became the turning point from frustration to Anger)…
1. Babies should never sleep in their parents bed because it is dangerous blah blah blah… and when I told her that I don’t agree she then told me about a baby that does in the moms bed…. we argued a bit on that point and then she went back and said her first point again and then said
2. they have to be sleeping through the night by 2 months old and then told me about CIO… this is when I kind of exploded, I told her that I actually love my kids and wouldn’t let them CIO because I want them to know that I will always be there for them, I asked her about breastfeeding babies and if she has the same “rule” especially since breast milk is digested easily and she said that by 8 weeks old babies no longer need to eat at night and they need to start to learn to be independent, she then told me that she is a doctor not a psychologist and she just says what she believes it to be better medially … I stood up at that point and started to leave…While I started picking up everything and started to head out of the door I asked her if she truly thought that a 2 month old needed to be trained how to be independent, and if it sleeping though the night was truly a medical issue, and I started to go for the paper on her desk, and this is where it really got to me… she didn’t let me pick up my paper on her desk for the blood test and continued in her rant about how dangerous it was to co-sleep and how she is a doctor etc… I told her at that point that she was crazy…(she answered by saying that I shouldn’t call a “pediatrician” crazy)….
I then took the papers from her hand and left….
This is what I was talking about the other day when I said that I can’t understand why people actually listen to idiots like her…
Why the hell did I have that kind of conversation when I was going in to check his blood for Iron? Why do these idiots think that their medical degree gives them the right to give out parenting advice especially to someone that didn’t need it and didn’t ask for it…
I left there feeling like I wanted to hit something, I wanted to hit her, I was shaking, I had tears in my eyes, I was upset and everything that I was in there in the first place was taken out of my head by her ignorance and stupidity, if she doesn’t even know the basics about breastfeeding how can I trust that she knows the basics about other things….
Without thinking, I headed to the blood test room… I asked them if it was OK if he had nursed before and they told me that breast milk is fine before a blood test and won’t change a thing. I asked if it was possible to keep him in the pouch like the last blood test we had taken and she said no and that she had to go in his arm.. I looked at her and asked if she was serious, Looked at Colin, thought it though a minute, and then asked if the paper would still be good in a few weeks and she said yes… I went back to the secretary and asked fer the prescription back…
I then headed across the hall to the archives room and asked to get a copy of Colin’s file. (I will have it at the beginning of next week) and then headed back to the blood test room and asked if I get the test done in a few weeks if I can just get the results myself so that I can bring them to the doctor of my choice and they said that there shouldn’t be a problem.
So….Here is my plan….
I love my family doctor even though he is an hour away and I don’t want to ever see that woman again… so I called my Family doctor when we got home, told him a bit about the situation and asked if it would be ok to just go get a blood test in a few weeks and then go see him with the results of the blood test and his medical file… he said that he would be happy to do that with me and that there is no problem waiting a few weeks (as long as it isn’t a few months) to see if things have improved and that he would be there when I was ready… he did however say that it would be better to make sure that he is eating well and to provide some high iron foods in the meantime to help him get his storage up…
So, though I didn’t want to go see dietitian I just took an appointment anyways.. I think it could be a good opportunity to ask a few questions about diet… best foods for iron, calcium and other vitamins and what food should be taken together etc to best help absorb…. especially because I would like to shift towards a more vegetarian diet and I have an older picky eater …
*hugs* man what a horrible experience but it sounds like you handled it quite well despite the stressfulness of the situation.
I might also suggest that you call around locally and see if you can arrange some interviews with other pediatricians in the meantime or see if any other mums in your area have decent recommendations. Before Paul was born we interviewed about five different doctors and met everyone from as crazy as your doctor sounds to almost perfectly compatible (and what we weren’t compatible on he was willing to not bully us about) and so we went with him and were hugely happy.
In the short term, though, going with the family doctor sounds like the best solution.
*Hugs* Many pediatricians are crazy. I’m sorry you encountered one of those.
I actually just read something about iron levels going down during infections, and that giving iron supplement during these times was a bad idea. It was in the book, Protein Power LifePlan, by Drs. Eades. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find anything to support that on the web, otherwise I’d post it. Drs. Eades do have an Ask the Doctors section on their website though. http://www.lowcarbcookworx.com/doctors/
A comment I got by e-mail….
BAD PED!!! I say way to go, Mama, standing up for your rights – VERY unprofessional of her. Ew. I’d have been shaking and crying, too. What a bad taste. People like that shouldn’t be practicing medicine, seriously. What a bully.
Also I’m sure you know, but kellymom.com might be a good resource for getting more iron into your breastmilk. I took Floridix during my pregnancy – a gentle, bioavailable iron supplement, I wonder if it would carry through breastmilk? It made a HUGE difference for me.
Man, I cannot believe that Ped treated you like that – is there someone you can report her to? I mean, she’s telling other people the same tripe. Even the WHO states that BM is beneficial until at least 2 years old.
Chasmyn
http://purplegoddessinfrogpyjamas.net
[…] I knew when I met her, when we had that run-in in her office that she was not the kind of doctor that I would ever be able to trust with the well being of my child. […]