Well… the doula came by yesterday and the boys were great and really let me talk with her… I found that we really hit it off but whole she was here my nose started to get stuffed up, my eyes were tearing and I started feeling off and even took a bit of my inhaler a bit later on…

This morning it hit me…she might be a smoker or live with a smoker and it was maybe an allergic reaction as I feel that I am getting more and more sensitive… I e-mailed her and was right. Both her and her DH are smokers… she asked if she could recommend me to other Doulas that she knows… I have a feeling that that might be best.

It is a bit sad because I really liked her… but it is something that I just can’t deal with… I don’t want to start tearing up, get stuffed up and have trouble breathing in labour…

I may meet with another Doula… and if not well I will just stick to my original plans of ust having Simon, the kids and maybe a friend or two depending on if they can make it or not…

Maybe I can talk to them a bit more and get them ready for what may or may not happen in birth and really talk to them about what I expect from them…