In the last few weeks I have seen a big change in Xavier’s interests and the way he is looking at things…
First… He now sits down at the table and draws… out of his own accord…
Every few months in the past I would try to get him to do that and most of the time nothing came out of it… he would be frustrated that what he drew didn’t look like what he wanted to draw. I would get frustrated because I thought that he “should” be doing it and maybe even liking it but he wasn’t… I finally let go of that idea and just waited… The paper, crayons, markers and all of the other creative stuff were accessible he would use them when he wanted… or at least I hoped… and now he does… Our creative line that hangs in the kitchen was bare or full of old creations for the longest time and now it has all fresh stuff on it.. and there are now even a few drawings taped to the wall that Xavier put up…
Another big change in Xavier is eating… he is now trying foods that he has always turned his nose up to… Supper time has been a lot more fun and I love seeing him discover new tastes… Colin of course is going into the picky stage… but a weird one… he will eat Sushi and seaweed salad but won’t eat pepperoni pizza…
I go through phases of feeling that I need to do more than unschooling… I think a lot of it has to do with the lack of real-life support.. I truly believe that unschooling is the right way for our family though and as the kids grow older, because really even Xavier is still so young, I feel my confidence will grow.
For now… I am learning to relax, answer questions and let them discover… and though there are still many struggles to overcome for myself I love the path that we are letting them lead.
As for feeling you need to do more than unschooling, why not give yourself permission to be “unschoolish” rather than totally unschooling? You can adjust and find your rhythm (sp?) as you go.
I used to read a lot of the forums on unschooling, and what struck me over time is how dogmatic they are about it, and condemning of anything but pure adherence to the unschooling dogma, which is kind of ironic. A lot of unschoolers are so rigid in their thinking that you have to be 100% unschooling, 100% of the time. I would rather think that one could be 90% or even 98% unschooling and still have some things where you lead, and even might have to coax and cajole a bit. That’s just normal life, and it won’t shatter a child to do a bit of non-child-led stuff too.
One of the things that worries me (and I’m not projecting onto you, just sharing my own worry as we might homeschool/unschool too, we’re undecided) is that I’ve read some blogs of unschooled kids and they seem to really struggle in life financially. There’s not enough info on their blogs to see the roots, but it seems to come from being a little too much uncontrolled by society (i.e. not succumbing to authority, not allowing oneself to be made to get credentials etc.). While in theory I’m so into that, in practice it makes for a very difficult life, and while I suffered terribly getting my credentials, and yeah, I still think the whole process is totally stupid 20 years later, it’s made my life much easer to have them, so it was a worthwhile tradeoff to jump some hoops in a society that hinders your progress without them.
Anyway, just musing away on your blog, as I figure you probably muse about these things too. I love hearing about your kids and your un/home/schooling!
I truly believe in unschooling though I would not describe myself as a radical unschooler.
Honestly, I am not opposed to having a small curriculum, sitting down and “doing school” but I am in the unschooling mind that I want that to be child led. I will not coaz and cajole a bit to make my child learn something he is not interested in or may not be ready to learn.
My best learning was done when I was left to my own devices… I love researching and used to go to the library to do my own research after school… having to learn things in class was boring and really pretty worthless because if I wasn’t interested in it I loss the knowledge when I didn’t need it anymore… I don’t want that for my children.
Furthermore.. If I was to present a curriculum to Xavier it would be met with resistance. I have a feeling that Colin may ask for that later on… of course… both could surprise me either way.
I don’t see the problem being with unschooling. Unschooling is not about “not succumbing to authority, not allowing oneself to be made to get credentials”… at least it is not to me and I will not be teaching that to my children…
On a personal note, I succumbed to authority and was coerced in the idea that I needed credentials… I have a degree…
and I regret it because all it brought was debt.